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The Man in the Mirror

Published: 23 September 2021
Written by Joseph Binning
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Categories: Beliefs

The Man in the Mirror

Every morning I see him. Every morning, he stares back at me. Some days in wonder. Some days in disbelief.

Some days I do not recognize him. Some days he is mighty. Some days he is not. Some days he is vibrant. Some days he is old, almost ancient.

But every day he shows up. Without fail, he is there. Waiting. Waiting for me to ask him that fatal question. The one that drives him yet frightens him at the same time.

Every day I have an appointment with him, and I must ask the question. Some days he can’t wait to be asked. Some days, I would rather not ask him.

He will answer, truthfully and honestly. Even if he would rather not. Because he must. Not because he has to, because he chooses to.

I ask him, “are you the man you are supposed to be and are you doing your best to stay that way?”.

As men, we don’t like accountability. We like to be anonymous. To do things our own way. Reinventing the wheel because we have a better way. We are this way because it’s easier. Easier to hide.

 

The Man in the Mirror Every morning I see him. Every morning, he stares back at me. Some days in wonder. Some days in disbelief. Some days I do not recognize him. Some days he is mighty. Some days he is not. Some days he is vibrant. Some days he is old, almost ancient. But every day he shows up. Without fail, he is there. Waiting. Waiting for me to ask him that fatal question. The one that drives him yet frightens him at the same time. Every day I have an appointment with him, and I must ask the question. Some days he can’t wait to be asked. Some days, I would rather not ask him. He will answer, truthfully and honestly. Even if he would rather not. Because he must. Not because he has to, because he chooses to. I ask him, “are you the man you are supposed to be and are you doing your best to stay that way?”. As men, we don’t like accountability. We like to be anonymous. To do things our own way. Reinventing the wheel because we have a better way. We are this way because it’s easier. Easier to hide. We were all born like a bull in a China shop. We crash through life sometimes, not noticing the damage we do to what is around us. We were born that way, on purpose. Bulls can be extremely dangerous. They are big, strong, and powerful creatures. Put them in a ring and place a cowboy on their back and watch what happens. The cowboy eventually sails into the air, only to have a sudden stop caused by the ground. Yet to watch a bull in his natural environment and he seems docile, calm, almost gentle. He is the symbol of strength and prosperity. We refer a bull market to as strong with good growth potential. He brings calm and protection to his fold. They know that as long as he is near danger will not be of concern because if it appears, he will swiftly and harshly deal with it. His purpose is to serve, protect, and to ensure the fold increases and prospers. That is his purpose. He is a beast. As men, we are called upon to be a beast, not a lamb. “Hard times create strong men, strong men create good times, good times create weak men, and weak men create hard times.” The quote, from a novel by the author G. Michael Hopf, sums up a stunningly pervasive vision of history. Today's man has gone from being a beast to a lamb. We slaughter lambs. We fear beasts. As a man, you are called to be a beast and to get the beast under control. This is not to say you are to tame the beast. Far from it. Men no longer lead families. Mostly women do. The modern man is no longer the leader. They have become sheep. Asking permission of their wives rather than asking their opinions. Ask your friends who are married who controls the checkbook. Mostly it is the woman. Women do not control the checkbook because they want to, mostly. They control the checkbook because they need to. Men relinquish it to them to manage. They do not want the responsibility. The average man in America gains 30 pounds in the first five years of marriage. Men have gone soft. Men; • No longer make decisions (just ask him where he wants to eat. His typical answer will be “wherever you want, dear”). • Are not the protector of the family. • Do not set a healthy example for the family. • No longer respect themselves enough to take care of themselves. • Do not show a positive example of self-discipline and self-denial to the family. (is it any wonder the children act up?). The divorce rate in America is 44.6%. the average marriage in America lasts 8.2 years. Divorce rates go higher in professions where the man is away from the family unit longer. The number one reason for divorce is lack of commitment, followed by infidelity, excessive conflict, married to young, and financial issues. If I asked you to fly on a plane that had a 44.6% chance of crashing, would you still fly on it? If you thought that there was a 44.6% chance that someone else would have just as much or more input in the say of your children’s lives, would you still have one, or two, or three? If you thought you had a 44.6% chance that the woman you love and adore would hate you in as little as five years, would you still marry her? As men, we are called on to be a beast, not a lamb. We slaughter lambs and fear beasts. As a beast, you must slaughter the laziness within you. As a beast, you must drive away the selfishness you show by putting the family second, third, or even fourth. As a beast, we must fight the animal that lives within us so we can be show those you love the gentler side of us yet still allow the beast to reign. As a beast, you must at all times be willing to defend, protect, and provide for your families. As a beast, you must learn to do that which you might not be good at now. As a beast, you must realize that your families do not care about why you were away from them, and only care that you are there with them. As a beast, you must fight the urge to “just relax for a moment”. As a beast, you must work hard to earn your family's respect and trust. This is done by being there. Showing them by example. Living it. As a beast, you are called to create safety and prosperity for the family unit. As a beast, you are called to have a daily meeting with the man in the mirror and ask him “are you the man you are supposed to be and are you doing your best to stay that way?”. If the answer is no, slaughter the lamb and release the beast. You might also like this: IN ORDER TO LOVE SOMEONE WELL, YOU MUST LOVE YOURSELF, FIRST * 12 EASY STEPS TO LEARN HOW And this one: WHY THE MESSAGE YOU MATTER, EVEN IF YOU DON’T THINK SO IS SO IMPORTANT NOW If you have enjoyed this article, please visit me at www.JosephBinning.com for more helpful tips and articles. You can also get more helpful information in my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here Amazon You Matter, even if you don't think so For my free report Happiness Is A Choice click here: Happiness Is A Choice Free Report Remember: Happiness is a choice, so be happy.

We were all born like a bull in a China shop. We crash through life sometimes, not noticing the damage we do to what is around us. We were born that way, on purpose.

Bulls can be extremely dangerous. They are big, strong, and powerful creatures. Put them in a ring and place a cowboy on their back and watch what happens. The cowboy eventually sails into the air, only to have a sudden stop caused by the ground.

 

Yet to watch a bull in his natural environment and he seems docile, calm, almost gentle. He is the symbol of strength and prosperity. We refer a bull market to as strong with good growth potential.

He brings calm and protection to his fold. They know that as long as he is near danger will not be of concern because if it appears, he will swiftly and harshly deal with it.

His purpose is to serve, protect, and to ensure the fold increases and prospers. That is his purpose. He is a beast.

As men, we are called upon to be a beast, not a lamb.

“Hard times create strong men, strong men create good times, good times create weak men, and weak men create hard times.” The quote, from a novel by the author G. Michael Hopf, sums up a stunningly pervasive vision of history.

Today’s man has gone from being a beast to a lamb. We slaughter lambs. We fear beasts.
As a man, you are called to be a beast and to get the beast under control. This is not to say you are to tame the beast. Far from it.

Men no longer lead families. Mostly women do. The modern man is no longer the leader. They have become sheep. Asking permission of their wives rather than asking their opinions. Ask your friends who are married who controls the checkbook. Mostly it is the woman.

Women do not control the checkbook because they want to, mostly. They control the checkbook because they need to. Men relinquish it to them to manage. They do not want the responsibility.

unhealthy man

The average man in America gains 30 pounds in the first five years of marriage.[1] Men have gone soft.

Men;

  • No longer make decisions (just ask him where he wants to eat. His typical answer will be “wherever you want, dear”).
  • Are not the protector of the family.
  • Do not set a healthy example for the family.
  • No longer respect themselves enough to take care of themselves.
  • Do not show a positive example of self-discipline and self-denial to the family. (is it any wonder the children act up?).

The divorce rate in America is 44.6%.

the average marriage in America lasts 8.2 years.

Divorce rates go higher in professions where the man is away from the family unit longer.

The number one reason for divorce is lack of commitment, followed by infidelity, excessive conflict, married to young, and financial issues. [2]

If I asked you to fly on a plane that had a 44.6% chance of crashing, would you still fly on it?

wolf-3122343_1280

If you thought that there was a 44.6% chance that someone else would have just as much or more input in the say of your children’s lives, would you still have one, or two, or three?

If you thought you had a 44.6% chance that the woman you love and adore would hate you in as little as five years, would you still marry her?

As men, we are called on to be a beast, not a lamb. We slaughter lambs and fear beasts.

As a beast, you must slaughter the laziness within you.

As a beast, you must drive away the selfishness you show by putting the family second, third, or even fourth.

As a beast, we must fight the animal that lives within us so we can be show those you love the gentler side of us yet still allow the beast to reign.

As a beast, you must at all times be willing to defend, protect, and provide for your families.

As a beast, you must learn to do that which you might not be good at now.

As a beast, you must realize that your families do not care about why you were away from them, and only care that you are there with them.

As a beast, you must fight the urge to “just relax for a moment”.

As a beast, you must work hard to earn your family’s respect and trust. This is done by being there. Showing them by example. Living it.

As a beast, you are called to create safety and prosperity for the family unit.

As a beast, you are called to have a daily meeting with the man in the mirror and ask him “are you the man you are supposed to be and are you doing your best to stay that way?”.

If the answer is no, slaughter the lamb and release the beast.

lion-667585_1920

 

You might also like this: IN ORDER TO LOVE SOMEONE WELL, YOU MUST LOVE YOURSELF, FIRST * 12 EASY STEPS TO LEARN HOW

And this one: WHY THE MESSAGE YOU MATTER, EVEN IF YOU DON’T THINK SO IS SO IMPORTANT NOW

If you have enjoyed this article, please visit me at www.JosephBinning.com for more helpful tips and articles.

You can also get more helpful information in my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so

For my free report Happiness Is A Choice click here: Happiness Is A Choice Free Report

Remember: Happiness is a choice, so be happy.

Dream BIG

[1] Livestrong.com/ Why Do People Gain Weight After Marriage? /Accessed 09/20/2021/ https://www.livestrong.com/article/130602-people-gain-weight-after-marriage/

[2] The Hive Law/ (2021 Divorce Rate in America) How Many Marriages End In Divorce Statistics/ accessed 09/20/2021/ https://www.thehivelaw.com/blog/divorce-statistics-us-divorce-rate-in-america/

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

Published: 8 July 2021
Written by Joseph Binning
No comments
Categories: Beliefs, Blog

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

“Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you are going to get.”

-Forrest Gump

played by Tom Hanks-actor

Ever feel you are just reacting to life? Like you have no say in the matter? Does it seem like your world comprises you waking up, going to work, coming home, going to sleep, and then you die?

You are not alone. Millions of people do not know why they are here. What it is you are supposed to do to make your mark on life. Beyond the thought of getting married, having children, working for forty-plus years, and waiting for that last moment when you breathe your last breath.

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

Life happens FOR us, not to us. We just have to look at things a little differently in order to clear out the fog so we can see clearly.

Struggles in life come from our expectations of how we believe or think our lives should or should not be. But when we consider the power and wisdom of the source that created you, you can trust that something greater than us is at work and that your choices, combined with your higher source, come together to create an incomprehensible tapestry of greatness and beauty in your life.

The truth of the matter is that life is not happening to you, it is happening for you. You create your own life. You, and only you. The direction you go to directly results from choices and decisions you make for your life, not the result of what has happened to you.

“You are essentially who you create yourself to be and all that occurs in your life results from your own making.”

-Stephen Richards, author

Changing this mindset to go from victim to victorious, from having no power to having all the power, takes courage. It requires courage to change your mindset after believing something your entire life for change to happen.

“You gotta “be” before you can “do” and you gotta “do” before you can “have”.”

-Zig Ziglar-author, speaker

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

Courage means taking risks. Doing things differently but doing them! It means being afraid of something but not letting it stop you from achieving your goals in life. It means not listening to the voice in your head that is screaming “STOP” and doing it, anyway. There is only victory when we enter the fight.

“He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.”

-Muhammad Ali-world champion fighter

It requires change for anything great to happen in your life. Most people, secretly or openly, are afraid of change. Change is uncomfortable. It makes people nervous. The voices in the back of your head might do its best to convince you “this isn’t a good idea”, or “lets do this another time or another way.” Don’t listen.

Changing the way you look at the struggles in life will actually improve your life. Rather than asking “why me”, ask yourself “what am I supposed to learn?”

Change, like eating an elephant, is best done in small steps. Easily achievable steps. Don’t attempt to change everything unless you have the willpower to follow through. Otherwise, take small consistent achievable steps, gradually increasing them once you gain momentum.

“You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of success is found in your daily routine.”

-John Maxwell-author, speaker, pastor

Belief is the next step. Wanting to do something but not believing you can achieve the goal or dream is the number one killer of dreams and goals. It will keep you on the sidelines and never let you even get into the game, let alone win.

“The start is what stops most people.”

-Don Shula-football coach

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

Belief that you can achieve the goal or dream will get you to the finish line, even if you don’t believe you have the ability, willpower, strength, or means to accomplish it. Belief, especially in yourself, is a choice. Choose to believe.

“If I have the belief, I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”

Gandhi-referred to as “Father of the Nation of India,”

With each victory, no matter how great or small, you will implant in your brain that you can achieve your goal. Once you find you can do something, it is easier to repeat it. This is true with both good and bad. Each time it gets easier to win or lose, to achieve or fail.

With each victory you create a track record in your mind of what to do in that situation or circumstance so when you face it again, and you will be, repeat what you already have done. Don’t reinvent the wheel, just repeat it.

“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but the man who has practiced 1 kick 10,000 times.”

Bruce Lee-Martial Artist, Movie Starr, Author

History will always repeat itself unless you study it. With each victory or step in your journey, reflect on it. This does two things in your mind:

  1. It destroys the notion that you are powerless over your struggle.
  2. When you relive the victory in your mind, you remind yourself that you are a capable being with untapped powers you possibly forgot or did not know existed.

Reminding yourself that yes, you can do it, is the most rewarding and positive reaffirmation that you are strong, that you can do whatever you want and not fail if only you start and not quit.

Life Happens for Us, Not to Us

“Look at a day when you are supremely satisfied at the end. It’s not a day when you lounge around doing nothing. It’s when you had everything to do, and you’ve done it.”

-Margaret Thatcher- Prime Minister of the United Kingdom

You might also like this: IN ORDER TO LOVE SOMEONE WELL, YOU MUST LOVE YOURSELF, FIRST * 12 EASY STEPS TO LEARN HOW

And this one: WHY THE MESSAGE YOU MATTER, EVEN IF YOU DON’T THINK SO IS SO IMPORTANT NOW

If you have enjoyed this article, please visit me at www.JosephBinning.com for more helpful tips and articles.

You can also get more helpful information in my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so

For my free report Happiness Is A Choice click here: Happiness Is A Choice Free Report

Remember: Happiness is a choice, so be happy.

You Cannot Change the Past, but You Can Change the Future

Published: 5 October 2020
Written by Joseph Binning
No comments
Categories: Change

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. We cannot change it without changing our thinking.”

― Albert Einstein[1]

 

The past, we all have one. It’s a good place to visit occasionally, just don’t park there. Contrary to popular belief, your past is not who you are, it’s just where you have been. You cannot Change your Past, but you can Change your Future. Here’s how.

The Oxford Dictionary defines past as: Gone by in time and no longer existing.[2] Yet some of us treat it as still in the present, still existing.

The past can leave scars, some deeper than others. The past might create bad habits. The past can create trust issues. The past can create forgiveness issues. The past can create all these things if we give it the power to do so.

blankI have a past. I have scars. I have had trust issues, bad habits, even forgiveness issues, until I didn’t.

When we give in to the power of the past, we are no longer in control of our own future. It takes control of our lives, our relationships, our friendships, and even our interaction with our fellow humans. You cannot Change your Past, but you can Change your Future.

When we associate ourselves with our past, we will experience feelings of guilt, shame, anxiety, regret, bitterness, resentment, low self-esteem, and even anger. But why do we hang on to these negative feelings? We hold on to these negative feelings out of fear. Fear of feeling pain which allows a comfort in our lives without feeling vulnerable.

When we encounter triggers that bring up our issues from the past we act on automatic out of self-preservation, or so we think. We hear those thoughts in our heads saying “see, it’s happening AGAIN”. It is easy to sabotage a simple situation when we act based on past experiences.

A man entered the subway car with his three children where he sat down and stared down at the floor while his children went about being unruly, disturbing the fellow passengers unnoticed by their father.

One passenger firmly asked the man to “control his children”. As if in a daze, the man lifted his head and looked at the passenger and said, “my apologies. They just lost their mother, cancer, and I guess this is how they are responding to it.”

The past, while valid, clouds our judgement in our present and future decisions unless we release ourselves from it. Not all men or women cheat, so thinking they do now won’t help you stay in a healthy relationship. Not all children are wild, so judging them without fully knowing the circumstances can backfire.

Creating a bright future requires us to move on from the past. We must change our way of thinking. We must change our way of looking at things. We must change the way we react to things.

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”

― Leo Tolstoy[3]

 

You cannot change your Past, but you can Change your Future. In my recently published book titled You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here  Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so I discuss how to be free from our past. How to live free from our past and not allow it to block the forward momentum of our future.https://www.josephbinning.com/failure%e2%9c%b5your-past-is-not-who-you-are-so-dont-give-up/

 

I discuss how our perceptions shape our thought process of how we see things and react to them in our daily life. When we perceive things as black and white because we are viewing life without the proper filters to allow us to see things as they really are, we decide based on bad data, thus we make yet another poor decision.

Unless we maintain a forward-directed focus and a firm belief in our “Self”, it will always be easy to allow our failures to block our progress.

Failures do not identify who we are.  Failures are lessons that teach us what did not work.

— Joseph Binning

Realizing that there are no mistakes in life without lessons is the first key to seeing that our past, or—as some may refer to it — failures, is an opportunity to learn or experience something new. There are no mistakes without lessons.  Everything happens for a reason, for our learning.

 

YOUR BELIEFS-Where Did They Come From?
Remember to enjoy the little things in life.

If you have enjoyed this article please visit me at www.JosephBinning.com for more helpful tips and articles.

You can also get more helpful information in my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so

For my free report Happiness Is A Choice click here: Happiness Is A Choice Free Report

Remember: Happiness is a choice, so choose to be happy.

[1] Change Quotes/Goodreads.com/accessed 10/05/2020/ https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/change

[2] Oxford Dictionary/Past Definition/accessed 10/05/2020/https:// https://www.lexico.com/definition/past

[3] Change Quotes/Goodreads.com/accessed 10/05/2020/ https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/change

The Key to Intimacy in Love, Real Love, Is Communication

Published: 17 August 2020
Written by Joseph Binning
No comments
Categories: Relationships

JosephBinning.com

“Far too many people are looking for the right person, instead of trying to be the right person.”–Gloria Steinem.

As humans, we all desire and seek Love. We were, in fact, created to find, fall into, and be in Love. Finding it is easier than keeping it. For Love to last and remain passionate, warm, safe, and trustworthy, intimacy is the key. Intimacy brings you close. Intimacy creates trust. Intimacy builds the bond that will keep you together when the storms of life befall you. The key to creating intimacy, in any relationship, is communication.

For men (and I know because I am one of them) the subject of intimacy is confusing. I have heard it said from a trusted friend of mine that in relationships you will either misunderstand or be misunderstood. The trick is to figure out which one it is.

When a woman tells a man, she wants an intimate relationship with him she means she wants to feel close to him, trust him, and have the relationship where she could bare her soul and share all of her secrets to and be able to trust that all will be safe.

When a man hears a woman tell him she wants an intimate relationship with him, he sees her naked, in bed.

Intimacy, as a subject, is a difficult thing to understand. Especially for men. Dictionary.com defines intimacy as “a feeling of being intimate”. (A lot of help that does to help me understand it.) “a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group.” There it is again, sex (at least in a man’s mind).

Last, “sexual intercourse”. And there it is in black and white.[1]

It’s no wonder that men and women struggle with intimacy in relationships. We confuse the sex with closeness, a bond, a spiritual connection. But it’s just sex. Eventually that all slows down or stops. Mix two jobs into the equation, throw in two kids, add some outside pressures from community or possibly family, and suddenly your roommates who only connect when you brush by each other in the hallway going opposite directions.

After the beginning stage of a relationship is over, lovingly nicknamed the Honeymoon Stage, and the relationship feels “familiar or comfortable”, for a woman to stay closer to her partner she needs a deep connection to them. She needs to feel safe. She needs to feel she is seen, heard, appreciated, cherished, and adored. If you give her these things, she will faithfully follow you anywhere and be supportive of you. But she will only do that with intimacy. Once that disappears, so will she.

Intimacy is not sex. Sex results from intimacy. Every woman will desire her partner passionately if you are intimate with her. It’s simple, basic chemistry. Get a woman to desire you and she won’t want to take her hands off you.

We only create intimacy with communication. Words spoken. A conversation between two people.

 

According to speech mastery.com, in an article titled Words Spoken, How Many Do You Use in a Day? They report that men speak on an average 10,000 words per day and women speak on an average 25,000.[2]

For men, and remember I am one, the fundamental problem is that we speak most of our words BEFORE we come home.

In my upcoming book What Every Man Needs to Know About Women, or how to have my wife WANT to have sex with me again, I speak to men on how to create intimacy with your partner. The fact is you chose her. Her, not someone else. Finding her was tough. You had countless other attempts to find “Your Person” but they didn’t cut it. She is “The One”.

To protect this blessed gift you have, and it is a gift, will require you give her what she needs to feed her soul in this relationship, otherwise she will find it somewhere else. This is not to complete her. She doesn’t need you for that since she is complete and capable without you already. Don’t believe me? Don’t give her what she needs and watch her take care of herself without you.

But if you give her what she needs, you have a life of bliss.

 

blank

 

How to Create Intimacy with Communication

Here are some suggestions of how to create Intimacy with Communication in your relationship.

  1. Make eye contact

Whenever someone speaks to me and refuses to make eye contact with it me makes me feel they are being untruthful or disrespectful. When you speak with her, look her in the eyes. The eyes are the window to the soul. You will, if you try, be able to “see” her feelings. You will know how she feels and how important to her what she is saying is to her.

  1. Be Present

The easiest way of making someone feel alone in a room, and this goes for both men and women, is to be somewhere else instead of being with them. When you are with her, BE WITH HER. Work will always be there. Who scored the winning goal doesn’t matter. What your friend on the other side of the world you have never met posted to social media doesn’t matter. The moment you are in is all that matters. Time is the only resource we cannot get back. Don’t waste it.

  1. Be A Good Listener

Men are rational creatures, and women are emotional creatures. That’s just how we were created. If a woman trusts that you will listen, she will come to you. Most of the time she doesn’t need your help, she just wants you to listen. Don’t confuse the two. It’s easy to say, “well just do so and so and it solves your problem”. That’s not what she needs unless she asks for a suggestion. Women talk out problems, usually with other women because men do not listen. When she comes to you, she sometimes just needs to vent. Let her. It’s not a reflection on you, it’s just how she feels. Give her that.

4. It’s Not All About You

As men, we get offended when a woman shares her feelings with us. It’s as if she is attacking us, so we go on the defense. That’s the easiest way for her to shut down, withdraw, and learn you cannot be trusted with her feelings. She needs to learn I can trust you to listen. You are not in charge of her feelings; she is.

  1. Protect Her from Her Enemies

Her biggest enemy is your ego. As men we all have one, some bigger than others, and sometimes it gets in the way. When in doubt, put her first. Put her feelings first. Put her welfare first. Put her trust first. She will return the favor if we do it without expectations.

6.No Expectations

Conditional Love is the worst. I have had it, I didn’t like it, and I left it specifically for that reason. When you do something kind, gentle, loving, or as an act of Love, don’t keep a scorecard. And a gift, and we should look at these as gifts, are no longer gifts if you expect to be repaid or rewarded for them. They become bribes. When you give, and I hope you give freely and often, give out of a place of Love for that person “just because”. Not because of….

  1. Choose to be Kind, Instead of Being Right

When you have a choice, and you will choose kindness. Women respond to kindness better than being informed how wrong something is. They remember it both ways.

  1. You Are Responsible to Her, Not for Her

Women cannot embarrass you for their action because it is their actions. They can only embarrass themselves around you when you believe you are her parent instead of her partner. If she makes a mistake, and she will, just as you will, cut her the same slack you cut yourself. We all make mistakes. When you discuss it, speak kindly, so when the shoe is on the other foot she will remember and do in kind.

  1. Make Her Feel Like She Is the Only One in The Room

When you are with her, pay attention to her. Notice her. Tell her she is Beautiful, every time. All the time. Say it looking into her eyes. Gently hold her head and kiss her on the forehead, for no reason at all, and tell her how grateful you are to have her in your life. Not only will this fill her emotional bank account, but you will feel more connected to her.

  1. Appreciate Her for Who She Is

In relationships we give ourselves roles to fill, responsibilities to take, tasks we assign to ourselves. We share the duties of life. Show her you appreciate her by sharing her load. Do something without being asked. Buy or pick flowers for no reason. Write her a note telling her how much you value her and appreciate her. Any act of random kindness creates lasting appreciation and gratitude.

WOMEN LOOKING OUT TO SEA

Last, tell her you Love her by actions and words. I’m not saying buying her Love by showering her with gifts and trips. Gifts and trips have a place in every relationship, but they are not the glue that holds them together. They are the benefits of. It’s the little things that you do every day that will mean more to her that have a lasting value to her, and ultimately you. So, do them well.

[1] Intimacy/Dictionary.com/accessed 08/17/2020/ https://www.dictionary.com/browse/intimacy

[2] Speechmastery.com/ Words Spoken How Many Do You Use in a Day? /accessed 08/17/2020/ https://www.speechmastery.com/words-spoken.html

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Joseph Binning