Successful people spend 10% of their time focused on the problems

and 90% of the time focused on the solutions.

— Tony Robbins


I meet people every day who, when posed with a problem, only focus on what will go wrong. They justify that focus by rationalizing that they should explore all the options, or have a Plan B, when, they are operating from a fear-based state of being.  What are they afraid of?  

According to the article, “Top Ten Strong Human Fears” on, “Fear is an emotion that protects us from the threats in our surroundings, but which has grown to be more complex; with our fears extending from the weird to the plain absurd, there are certain fears that the great majority of human beings share.”

In order by the most common, modern humanity’s top ten fears are:

  • Failure

Failure is seen differently by everyone.  My favorite example of this is Walt Disney. They rejected him over 300 times, bankers who thought his idea of an amusement park with a Mickey Mouse theme was absurd. Imagine if he had quit after the 299th rejection.  We would never have experienced Disneyland, the Lion King, Beauty and the Beast, or Disneyworld!

  • Death

Fear of death can be linked to fear of the unknown. No one really knows what lies beyond this physical life until they enter it.  Until then, it is unknown.

  • Rejection

This social fear is one reason people blindly follow the actions of others. Based on a fear of being alone, some make their actions and choices on the validation, acknowledgement, or acceptance of others.

  • Ridicule

How many times have you not done something because you were afraid of being mocked or criticized for the way you thought you would look, sound, or seem to others?

  • Loneliness

Lack of human interaction can cause a multitude of problems, from feeling not seen, not loved, not valued, not desirable, and not worthy.  The fear of loneliness brings with it a fear of disconnection with life, love, unity, meaning, and purpose.

  • Misery

Fear of misery is fear of being in a state of great physical, mental, or emotional distress, discomfort, or hopeless suffering.  Ironically, sometimes the fear of misery brings emotional misery.

  • Disappointment 

Fear of disappointment is a fear of sadness, dissatisfaction, sorrow, or displeasure, from the lack of fulfillment of one’s hopes or expectations, or from displeasing another. This fear is part of the reason we avoid the unknown. 

  • Pain

Pain is physical or emotional suffering, or discomfort caused by illness or injury. We avoid it like the plague.  It also refers to emotional suffering or discomfort from loss, rejection, abandonment, or criticism.

  • The Unknown

We root This fear in fear of not being in control. If we do not know what will happen, or what something will be like, or where we will be, or if we cannot control the outcome.  But we never can anyway.

  • Loss of freedom

Not having a say in how you live, where you live, what you eat, when you sleep, how you spend your time, who you communicate and spend time with, how you take care of your body and possessions, or what and how you choose in any area of life is a lack of freedom, and imprisonment.

Fear of failure is the most common human fear and one of the most common reasons for a lack of self-discipline.  


  • Fear prevents us from expressing our truth. 
  • Fear prevents action.  
  • Fear prevents following our desires and dreams
  • Fear prevents taking initiative.
  • Fear prevents perseverance.
  • Fear results in a weakening of our inner strength, our self-esteem, our full experience of life and all its adventure and opportunities.
  • Fear manifests itself differently in each person. 


If we have perfectionist tendencies, we might have unrealistically lofty standards, unrealistic expectations, or harsh criticism from ourselves and others.  We may think moving forward into the fear will be bad and painful.  We may think in black and white with no concept of the larger middle grey areas.  


We are usually holding beliefs that are not true.  We do not understand that turning the light on our fears creates life-changing growth, learning, higher self-value, new opportunities, and other benefits.



What do fears have to do with discipline?  


Self-discipline is one of the most valuable and effective resources we have for looking past our beliefs and their associated fears.  Self-discipline is that fool-proof tool that shifts our thoughts and energy by refocusing us on our vision and the plan to get there.  Self-discipline takes us through the fear, without our even realizing it, and lands us at the end goals of our vision.  Self-discipline is our doorway to success.


While there are many factors that can contribute to a person’s level of success, self-discipline is the only measurable guarantee to sustainable, long-term success in life. This applies to our work, all our relationships, our bodies, our finances, our goal accomplishment, and our happiness.  We must integrate self-discipline into our daily routine.


According to a 2013 study by Wilhelm Hoffmann, people who achieve and maintain top levels of self-discipline are happier than those who do not.  The study found that self-disciplined people are more capable of dealing with goal orientated setbacks. They are less likely to allow setbacks and feelings to dictate the end results, and they pushed through the valleys of each setback. They seemed to focus more on the end goal than the present moment circumstances, which made it easier to remain focused.  Even when their present moment continually had changes and surprises, their end vision stayed intact.


Why is self-discipline such a struggle?  


The number one reason people struggle with self-discipline is that humans always seek the path of least resistance. It is human nature for everyone to be lazy sometimes, in some areas. Some have learned how to overcome this tendency.  Others have not.


The second reason is that we lack understanding of what self-discipline is and what it is not. 


Despite what many believe it to be, self-discipline is a learned behavior, requiring practice and consistent repetition. Self-discipline is the consistent practice of consciously choosing our thoughts and actions and redirecting ourselves when we observe ourselves not consciously choosing.


The pathway to reaching our goals is the same pathway to walking past our fears.  


It is developing a habit of intentionally chosen actions and thoughts that will produce the results we are looking for.  Keep in mind that lack of self-discipline, or lack of consciously choosing our actions and thoughts, can produce habits we do not want.  Remember, three weeks of consistently doing anything, whether intentional or random, positive, or negative, will create a habit of it.  Having a plan only completes half the job. We must do the steps in our plan, for the plan to work.


So, how do we learn self-discipline?  


We learn by noticing where our deficiencies might be and by knowing the symptoms of low self-discipline. 


Grab a pen and paper and notice which of these questions apply to you and write any thoughts you have about them.    

Ask yourself:

  1. Are you, or are you not satisfied with what you are getting out of life?
  2. Do you, or do you not feel as if you are winning at life?
  3. Do you feel as if you give in too easily to temptation?
  4. Do you feel as if you are a prisoner to negative emotions, such as frustration, resentment, criticality (self or others), anger, or depression?
  5. Do you, or do you not feel as if you can achieve or maintain balance in all areas of life?
  6. Do you feel you are unsuccessful in the way you want to be?
  7. Do you feel as if you have got too much on your plate?
  8. Do you feel as if you are or are not having as much fun or laughter in your days as you deserve?
  9. Do you feel bored, frustrated, or tired often?
  10. Do you feel you are behind in over one area of your personal or professional objectives?
  11. Do you procrastinate a lot?
  12. Do you feel you have gained weight or lost muscle tone?

Asking the tough questions, and answering honestly, is the first step in correcting any problem.



How to Start Applying Self Discipline

  • Create a vision of what you want in your mind.  

When I quit smoking, I first quit in my head. See in your mind what you want. 


  • Commit to your “self.”  

Find what motivates you—your why; write a list.  Keep it with you always and look at it when you feel weak. When I quit smoking after fifteen years my inspiration came by noticing my son wheezing from breathing in my second-hand smoke I exhaled, but I quit for my health first.  I wanted to be around longer.  I wanted to do more, see more, know more, be more—for my son and for me. That was my motivation.


  • Do it.  

Do not wait for it to “feel” right before you start, because it never will, or it will fluctuate like the wind. Like Nike says, “Just Do It!”  Lao TZU, of the Tao Te Ching wrote, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.”  Take the first step!


  • Set realistic goals. 

Do not bite off more than you can chew. Frustrated with quitting every year on New Year’s Day and starting up again two or three days later, I knew I needed a plan.  When I successfully quit smoking for good, I quit gradually, steadily reducing my intake over a two-month period. My plan kept me on track. I have not smoked since. Take slight steps. Do not decide you will start running and commit to a marathon next month if you have never run before. Do the research; read up on technique, nutrition, and stretching; find a coach or training program. 


  • Write the plan. 

Do not assume you will just automatically allow your vision and desire to take you to the end goal.  Make the plan, write it down, and post it up at eye level in a place you will see every day.  A plan is a set of mini steps toward your goals that take you to the finish line. You need to get it on paper and look at it frequently. Those who fail to plan, plan to fail.


  • Remove all temptations that stand in the way of your success. 

If one of your goals is to read more, unplug both your TV and the cable box.  Do not just turn it off; unplug it from the outlet. Waiting for the cable box to reset will make it less convenient to turn it on.  If you want to lose weight, throw away everything you have is not on your approved shopping list. Do not have it anywhere you can easily access it. Remove all temptations. 


  • Prearrange your schedule, to accommodate your desired habit.  

If you want to work out, go to sleep one hour earlier, and wake up one hour earlier.  Arrange your schedule with the steps, routines, and resources to support your goal, with no space for slip-sliding. Do not keep committing yourself to things, people, events, and activities that take your time and energy away from where you need it.  It will amaze you at how much energy you will have as you progress. 


  • Rearrange your environment.  

Arrange your space and routines to support your goal.  Plan not to be near, or in conversation with that person who always puts self-discipline on the shelf, or anyone who mocks you, steals your time, or has an unhelpful influence on you.  Arrange your work, home, car, and social environments with the focus of staying on track with your goal.


  • Identify your whiny voice 

The one you listen to in your head and from your mouth, that sabotages your wish every time.  You know the voice.  It says: “I don’t want to get up; it’s so early.  But I deserve the ice cream; I have been doing so well!  Just one cigarette will be okay.  It was a hard day; I am too tired to exercise.  I cannot do it; it is too hard.  All my friends are going; I will finish that project tomorrow.  I’ll just buy one thing and save my next paycheck.”  Quiet that voice. Have an intentional, focused conversation with that voice to thank it and let it know that you don’t want to hear it anymore and that you are focusing on what you want; then dismiss it.  


  • Divert your attention from the temptation or self-sabotaging thoughts by doing something else immediately.  

Meditate, turn on music, do ten or twenty jumping jacks, go for a run, take a shower, take a catnap, have a cup of tea, pet the cat, or take the dog for a walk.  


  • Get out your Why card and read it out loud.

Hearing your reasons why, out loud, in your own voice is one of the most powerful tools you have. Use it, often.


  • Keep a Victory Journal and fill it up.  

Get a hardcover journal, with pages you cannot tear out easily, and write every victory, no matter how small, every day.  Walk down a different street, so you do not pass the smoke shop, then write it down.  If you worked out that day, whether you walked, lifted weights, danced, played ball, did yoga, rode your bike, did martial arts or hula hoop, write it down.  If you ate within your healthy eating plan for breakfast, lunch, or dinner, write it down.  If you did all three, write it three times.  If you contacted that company to set up the meeting, write it down.  When you are in a valley, and that whiny voice talks to you, pick up the journal and read your victories out loud. It is easier to resist temptation when you hear a reminder of what you have done.


  • Reward yourself for achieving your goals.  

By giving yourself positive rewards for achieving your goals you are acknowledging your efforts, both minor and major. Buy an extra item of clothing, get a massage, or take a day trip. Pay cash for that purchase, rather than using credit. Small positive rewards are the key.


  • Commit to finish.  

Do not quit. If you quit, you only quit on yourself, and it is hard to live with yourself as a quitter. Do not hit the snooze button in life. Hitting the snooze button has you doing it over and over and over. 


What is the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing, day after day, and expecting different results.


When you quit, you do not show up for yourself.  If you do not show up for yourself, you tell the world that you do not know your value and abilities.  If you do not know your value and abilities, no one else will either.


For each new goal, wash, rinse, repeat.  

It takes only three weeks to create a solid, dependable habit.  Self-discipline is a habit, and it is a habit that you can become addicted to.  


What are you waiting for?  Never settle for the second-best version of YOU.


Never think you have arrived.  

Your journey is never over.

You will ALWAYS have to work at maintaining and nurturing the things that make you GREAT if you do not want to lose sight of them.

— Joseph Binning


If you’re like many of the billions of people alive right now, the current state of the world is causing you to wonder, to look up close at areas of our lives we had set aside, or get to know ourselves on a deeper level. Some are asking for the first time, or in a new way, Why am I here?  Or, What is my purpose in life? I asked myself the same questions, and the answers I found changed my entire life.  There is no better time than now to look at those areas, to know yourself in a way you have never known, know the part you play, and understand your purpose in this world.  I’d like to share with you some of the answers to your deepest questions and help you understand why knowing your deepest purpose matters more today than ever before.

follow this link to 7 Days To Discover Your Purpose

“The beautiful thing about learning is nobody can take it away from you”


— BB King



Personal growth is one of my favorite subjects, because without it, we cease to exist.

Imagine being a child and never growing through each developmental phase, or into adulthood or maturity.  Skipping a phase or two may be a fantasy for some; however, it is not the reality we came here to experience. Just as a child needs to grow and evolve, to become the person he or she can be, so does the adult.

Personal growth does not limit itself to physical growth.  Personal growth also includes emotional growth, intellectual growth, and spiritual growth.  Personal growth does not limit itself to age.  It is continuing in us from birth to death. 


“Personal growth refers to self-development of an individual toward the actualization of his or her potentialities.

Personal growth transforms an individual from dependence to self-direction.”





“Self-development” is the key phrase in the reference above. Perhaps the most important realization an individual can make in his or her quest for personal growth is that there is no single formula that defines what path will work for any individual. What is good for one person may not be what works for another.


We must adapt the seeker philosophy on our paths of personal growth.  We must do the research and put in the miles. It is not the destination that defines us.  It is the journey. It is what you find out about life and about yourself along the way, whatever that is, that creates the “YOU” you can become.  


“Your level of success will rarely exceed your level of personal development,

because success is something you “attract” by the person you “become.”


Jim Rohn


Many of us have natural talents and abilities, but do not strive to improve them.  Like muscles in the body, if we do not use our talents and abilities, we will soon lose them.  If we are not growing, we are dying. Sounds absurd, but it’s true. Every famous successful person whose name we immediately and easily recognize had to master that which he or she became known for.

We can have talent but be afraid to use it and never reach our potential.  Or, we can continually strive to become our potential.  It is a choice we either make, or do not make.


Why invest in personal growth?


To expand your abilities and skills.  To develop new aptitudes and strengthen existing ones.  To increase your understanding and knowledge. Knowledge is potential.  Applied knowledge is action, and it is in the action that our power lies. Having the knowledge about how to open a can of soup is only half as valuable as opening the can.


When you do not have the answers that understanding and knowledge provide, walking life’s path can be harrowing.  By investing in personal growth, we gain life experience, which—like a map—can guide us to where we want to go.  And, we gain wisdom.   


Walking through life with knowledge, experience, and wisdom gives us confidence and self-worth. Self-worth gives us the faith and inspiration to create the life we want.  In creating the life, we want, rather than reacting to life, we gain mastery of the items we value and the way we value them.


Spiritual Growth


Spiritual growth has many definitions, depending on the source and belief system of the person.  

As I have stated before, all religions of the world agree that humans begin in the Spirit form and temporarily transform into physical form for this human existence only to return to Spirit form.  We are spirits having a human experience. Not humans having a Spiritual experience.


Think about that for a minute, or an hour.  We all start at the same place. We all have a spiritual source. We are all part of something much greater than we could ever be alone.  We are all connected. We are all spirit connected to the vastness of the Universe, the source of all beginnings and endings.

All the knowledge of what will be, and has ever been, is within us and our connection to it, just waiting to guide us.   But it is up to us to discover it.  It is up to us to get in touch with it.  We need to grow, to understand who and what we really are.  How our spirituality grows and develops—or does not—depends on us. That is where the human experience comes into play. 


I use meditation for the guidance I seek. Meditation can be difficult or tricky in the initial stage of our practice. One must be still and focus. I focus on my breath. As I breathe in, I am thinking in with the good.  As I breathe out, I am thinking out with the bad.  We all meditate in different ways, whether we know it or not. Your meditation might be in the form of silent, relaxed contemplation, to increase your awareness and come to decisions.

You might walk, to clear your mind and know what you want or how you want to do it. You might be still, to receive guidance or answers. You might do guided breath work, or visualization, or yoga.  You might take a nap or connect in your sleep.  You might stare out into nature and let go.  You might connect in a long shower or bath, or in some form of water.  Regardless of the method, you are tapping into that vast resource of knowledge within you for an answer that already exists.


Your life is not random or a mistake. You are here for your Spirit-intended purpose. Your job is to discover what that is. It is your job to turn over the rocks to find it, not wait for it to appear. Columbus was a seeker.  The Americas did not find Columbus.  Columbus discovered the Americas. Stop waiting. You already have the answer. You are just not looking in the right place, or in the right way.  The answer will only come from inside you.  Just listen and trust what comes to you. 


Download my course SEVEN DAYS TO DISCOVER YOU PASSION if you need help identifying what your Passion is and how to develop it.




Physical Growth


In multiple religions, belief systems, and historical teachings, scholars believe that the body is our temple.  If we look at ourselves and dislike what we see, why do we resist changing ourselves, bettering ourselves, enlivening ourselves?   When we deface, dishonor, or ignore our body temples, we do not realize that we are dishonoring ourselves, and stunting our physical growth and our self-worth.

The mind and body work as one.  If someone throws a valuable piece of art in the trash, it does not make it any less valuable.  However, it treats the art in an undeserved and dishonorable way and wastes its potential.


I smoked for fifteen years.  It disgusted me with the thought of falling into such an expensive and nasty habit. It made me, my clothing, my car, and my environment stink, and it made my lungs feel awful.  On the first of January, every year, I quit, but then I would start back up two days later, if that long.  It was not until the day I realized what it was doing to my son when I saw him wheezing because of secondhand smoke he was inhaling, that it awakened me out of my unconsciousness and inspired me into growing stronger.


In that awareness, I became a seeker, searching for a way that I could quit for good. It was hard—so hard. The voices in my head kept repeating You can’t do this; just start back up, and your suffering will all stop.” To this day, quitting the habit has been the hardest thing I have ever done.  But I have not smoked since. 


How did I do it?  In the same way I have asked you in previous posts, to get a pen and write your responses and thoughts.  I put in writing my reason to change.  Every time I wanted to start back up again, I thought of that reason.  I remembered the actual action of putting my pen to paper and writing my reason, and all the emotion and conviction I felt while I wrote it. 


The process of my writing my reason to change, and reading my reason out loud every day, carved a new neuro pathway in my mind, that helped me to remember that my reason to change was so much bigger and more valuable to me than my reason to cave and keep the nasty addiction, which was just a habit.  


Habits are easy to start and difficult to change. It takes three weeks of consistently to create a habit, good or bad. Sometimes we just need the right reason to propel us toward physical improvement, or any kind of growth.


Without a strong enough reason to change, you will always leave a way out. A way to quit. There is an old saying about success by Plato: “If you want to take the island, then burn the boats.” Only you can find the right reason for you. What is your reason? Every person reading this has one. Find it. And write it. Then burn the boats. Leave no way to go back, only forward.




Emotional Growth


Emotional development is defined as a child’s growing ability to develop and regulate a full range of emotions, from sadness or anger to happiness and compassion, and shift from one to another in an easy, conscious, and free manner, preparing the child to take on more responsibility for his or her internal state.


Emotional development also refers to the child’s ability to develop secure relationships, social interaction, empathy toward others, and resolution of conflicts, without feeling the need or desire for physical aggression. The continual development and strengthening of all these abilities are emotional growth.


Growing scientific evidence shows that a child’s experiences during the early years play a significant role in emotional development.  Studies have shown that the emotional climate at home and the emotional regulations displayed by parents and caretakers affect a child’s emotional development.  


Children who do not develop emotional health, freedom, and maturity are at risk of forming unhealthy attachments, experiencing peer group challenges, and suffering from mental illness. 


Unfortunately, many of us did not develop the proper tools we needed to develop healthy emotionally.  We formed our Habits and beliefs throughout childhood; we created the patterns of our lives, and we carried these patterns into adulthood without realizing it.  It is not until we experience setbacks and adversity and finally take a serious look at the person we see in the mirror each day


Part of our dysfunction in developing emotionally lies in the very widespread belief that a specified set of behaviors, circumstances, and realities are normal and healthy.  But there is a vast difference between normal and common.


Are these things we consider “normal,” normal because we have the personal experience of understanding that they are normal, did someone teach or tell you they are normal, or because they are so commonly seen around us we believe they are normal?  Are they common in another state?  Another part of the world?  Another race?  Another culture?  Another time periods.  Why, or why not?  Never stop asking why.


Never stop being curious.  Never stop paying attention to the emotional and sensory signals within you.  Imagine you are walking on a trail in the middle of nowhere with no one around, and the trail you are on leads to a dangerous cliff that would kill you if you walked off it. Would you continue in the same direction on that trail because someone told you to, or would you listen to your inner guidance and change directions?


Are you choosing where you are going and why you are going there?  Or, are you following?  Are you listening to your inner knowing, guidance, emotional cues, and senses?  This is the strengthening of your emotional muscles.   If you ignore these innate abilities, you suppress your emotional growth, weaken your abilities to experience compassion, joy, and peace, and become disillusioned and hurt, or hurt others.  Never stop following your highest emotion. 


Intellectual Growth


Intellectual growth refers to: “personal or communal intellectual development.
We can derive this from the spreading of new ideas, such as during the Enlightenment, or through personal educational pursuits, like higher education”


Intellectual development is the development of independent thought and reason, in relation to the world around you. 


To attain Intellectual health, growth, and well being, you must first start by expanding your knowledge.  When we learn or practice a new skill, read a thought-provoking book, get involved in the community, attend lectures, art exhibits, or musical or theater performances, or learn a new language, we are growing our intellectual health. 


In addition, we are strengthening our critical thinking and analysis abilities. Think of a child who wants to understand everything because it does not know the why or how. It is when the child asks us “Why?” that we need to understand the full answer we are about to give. If we honestly want to give the child the best, most truthful answer, so he or she can use that information to make good decisions, we must give the very highest information we can get. And to do that, we must research, including searching within ourselves.


We should look at Intellectual growth in the same way.  Are the decisions we make based on the absolute best information that we can find and that is available? Or are we using outdated or incorrect data that we provided ourselves with, or others told us?


Is the information we used based on our own knowledge, or based on that of people who teach us to follow, believe, and respect? And does the information align with whom we are as individuals, or are we just following an outdated and incorrect pattern taught to us somewhere, sometime and never checked to see if it is valid? 


The intellect is a powerful muscle that can atrophy if not stimulated and strengthened continually throughout our lives.




Write your responses to the following questions: 


Do you strive to improve yourself physically?  


Do you strive to improve yourself emotionally?


Do you strive to improve yourself spiritually?


Do you strive to improve yourself intellectually?


Are you open to new ideas? 


Do you try to learn new skills?


Do you appreciate stimulating mental activities?


Do you use creativity to solve problems?


Do you consider opposing ideas and opinions?


Do you strive to understand yourself and your emotions?


If you answered no to any of the questions above, it is time to open yourself to your higher potential.


What areas of yourself and your life would you like to see growth in most?  


What or who, is holding you back from growing?


Life can be scary sometimes, but the more you grow, the more you will know. The more you know, the more change you can help to create, for yourself, and for those around you. 





Growth cancels out fear. 

Joseph Binning


Think of growth as an investment in YOU, your future, what you will give to the world, and everything and everyone that has anything to do with you. To have more than you have got, you must become more than you are now.  You must grow into the new skin of your potential.


By investing the time and energy in yourself, your reward will be exponentially greater than your initial investment.  And then, one day, you will discover that the student has become the teacher. 


It is in the struggle and the battle that heroes are born.

Joseph Binning


Only through lifelong growth and the desire to expand can change happen. Get your boots on and get in the trenches.  Then watch yourself rise.

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Carefully watch your thoughts, for they become your words.

Manage and watch your words, for they will become your actions.

 Consider and judge your actions, for they have become your habits.

Acknowledge and watch your habits, for they shall become your values.

Understand and embrace your values, for they become your destiny.


— Mahatma Gandhi



Our feelings, thoughts, and responses to life have a great deal to do with the conditions in our upbringing, who raised us, the locations in which we grew up, the way we gained our knowledge, and the beliefs of the people who raised or trained us.

We make choices based on our culture, tribe, family, and educational system, etc., and we base our ideas about life on what these institutions taught us.

From before you can even remember, you have been making thousands of decisions and choices, many of which you were not aware of making, but following, or doing out of habit, or by not thinking, or choosing by lack of a specific desire.

Every one of your decisions—both those you were aware of making, and those you were not aware of making—come into play every day of your existence.
From birth, you shaped by decisions and choices you make, and decisions that others make for you, based primarily on someone else’s direction, opinion, desire, belief, need, or pressure.


Most mammals emerge from the womb like glazed earthenware emerging from a kiln—

any attempt at remolding will cause a scratch or break them.

Humans emerge from the womb like molten glass from a furnace.

Mold able and shape able with surprising freedom.


—Yuval Harari, Author, Sapiens


Through family traditions, education, politics, religion, culture, and other institutions, from childhood, it has molded you into becoming someone and something someone else wants you to be.
Without realizing it, you become products of your conditioning.  What you perceive to be normal or true is a product of your history and upbringing, and these perceptions influence your decisions and actions every day.



Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.


— Wayne Dyer


I like to rephrase Mr. Dyer’s quote:


If you change the way you look at things, you will change the way you see things.

— Joseph Binning


I created an online survey and asked my readers this question “What’s the first thing you notice about someone you see for the first time, when seeing them from a distance?” 
The overwhelming response was, “appearance.”  When asked what the second thing is, the majority answered, “the way they carried themselves and if they seemed approachable, or not, from a personal safety standpoint.”


We as people should not  judge others, but we do. We need to ask ourselves this critical question: is the decision I made in my judgement of another person based on facts, or the facts I fabricated and placed in my minds based on past teachings or experiences?


A man entered onto a subway train with his two children and sat in his seat staring ahead in a daze, as if lost in deep thought. His two children were running everywhere, being loud and unruly.  After some time, an annoyed passenger approached the man and said, “Excuse me, could you please tend to your children? They are disturbing the other passengers and it is annoying to me.”  The man looked up at him and said, “I’m sorry, they just lost their mother.  Cancer.  I guess they don’t know how to deal with it.”


In the example I just gave we see that the man on the subway saw from the viewpoint of his own perceptions, which he based on his perceived facts, but were actually false and based on everything experience has taught him, without knowing that he was not seeing the facts for what they really were.

Most times, that which we perceive as reality, is not an actual reality. We base it on our experiences; the passenger thought the children were unruly, and the man was a bad parent.


We base perceived reality on a limited, incomplete, and/or false knowledge, beliefs, and data.  Our perceptions of everyone and everything outside of us are all based on our reality—our learned beliefs, experiences, and expectations from them—though we believe we are being fair and seeing factual reality. 
Our perceived reality is the frame through which we see and explain the world as seen through our eyes. 


We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are.


― Anaïs Nin


One of the biggest thoughts that block our growth, peace, and happiness is the reasoning that, “It’s always been this way, so we need not change it.” 


There is a story of a woman who made a pie that her family loved. The problem was the pie was always too small for the family. When asked why the family recipe called for the pie to be so small by her daughter, the mother replied, “that how it’s made according to my mother’s recipe.”


The next day the woman asked her mother why the family recipe called for the pie to be so small and her mother replied, “that how it’s made according to my mother’s recipe.”


The next day the woman’s mother called her mother and asked her why the family recipe called for the pie to be so small. Her mother replied, “because that’s all the bigger I could make it in my oven.” Her oven was smaller than the next generations oven and the generation after that. Yet for three generations, and almost four, nothing changed. Or improved.


We need to change. We need to ask ourselves: Why?  

Why do I see things this way?

Why do I react this way?

Why do I act this way?

Why do I say these things?


Here is an exercise to help you discover some hard truths. Take a moment, write the answers, and answer as honestly as you can.


  • Did you choose your profession based on your own perception of it?  
  • Was it because you thought it would provide stability, or esteem, or some quality that you believed would be necessary or valuable?  
  • Was your decision a result of discussions with one or more parents, counselors, experts, or friends, and their perceptions of it?  
  • Did you decide based on other’s perceptions, wishes, or offers?  
  • Did you choose it purely from your own thoughts and desires?
  • Did you marry or enter a relationship with someone of the same religious affiliation?
  • Did you choose that person?  
  • Were you following the family’s tradition, desires, or direction?  
  • Was your choice not influenced by religion at all?
  • Are you living in a location, dwelling, city, or state that you chose?
  • Are you living in a location out of financial or other necessity?
  • Are you living somewhere out of someone else’s desire, influence or requirement, or to be in proximity to a person, family, or group of people? 
  • Are you living in a location for the pure and simple reason that you liked it and desired to live there?
  • Have you attended a college, university, or educational institution?
  • Is it because you chose to, or chose not to?  
  • Was the choice you made yours, or was it made under the request or influence of someone else, or to make someone happy?
  • Are you deciding based on someone else’s opinion, request, need, or demand?  
    Are you deciding based on your own desires, knowledge, or preferences?


How did you score? Are they decisions you have made? Or are they the echoes of someone else, someone else’s vision, or lack of, for you?


Three men were building a wall at a beautiful church.  When asked what he was doing, the first replied, “I’m stacking these stones.”  The second man answered, “I’m building a wall.”  The third man declared, “I’m helping to create a magnificent place for people to find comfort and peace.”  Three different men doing the same task have three different perceptions of what they were doing.  Only one knew why.


They had trained the first man to believe all he was doing was stacking stones for a living.


They trained the second man to believe he was a builder of walls.


Even though he had been trained, the third man chose to open his eyes, and see things for what they really are, and could see what was happening in his life.


Which one is most like you?  Are you like the first man, seeing things as other has taught you?


Are you like the second man, living as others have taught you?


Or are you like the third man, living life with your eyes fully open so you can see the world as it really is around you?


I hope you will become like the third man and see the beauty that surrounds you.



When people see some things as beautiful, other things become ugly.

When people see things as good, other things become bad.


— Tao de Chang

Chapter 2 Verse 12

Stop repeating what never worked.

Stand back and ask for a new solution.

— Deepak Chopra


CHANGE—why is it so hard?  Why do we dread it?  Why do we put it off until we can’t bear the pain of not changing?  If change were easy, you wouldn’t be reading this book, and I wouldn’t have written it.  If it were easy, we would all be doing it willingly and frequently.  Complacency is a dream killer.  We feel its effects in our lives, which is a good thing. It creates a realization in us that there is a need to change.  Change causes us to develop, expand, become more us, grow into our best selves, and become happier.  Change causes us to become our own thought leaders, the internal force that inspires and drives us.


So, how do we know whether we need to change and when?  By asking ourselves what we desire and why we desire it. Finding our why can be as simple or as difficult as we make it. For a minute, or a few, focus deeply on what you don’t like about that thing you don’t want, that thing you want to change.  What is it that makes you sick or disgusted, angry or bored, ashamed or afraid, frustrated or over it?  What makes you lose sleep at night?


Here’s where discernment comes in.  If your why is that you want to approval, then you want to change yourself for someone else.  But someone else’s doesn’t matter, remember?  We just learned that in the previous chapters.  If you’re to like yourself more, you must reach a point where you Love yourself, with no conditions needed.  With that said, wanting change for awakening, actualizing your potential, healing, letting go of what doesn’t serve you, or integrating self-discoveries is the best reason and motivator to change. And with these kinds of changes, all our future experiences in life will shift for the better.  Along those lines, if your why is to be healthier or feel more vitality or happiness, there is no better motivation for change.


Most take better care of their cars than they do their mind-body-spirit selves.  Although everything in life is temporary, including life itself, you’re here for a stretch, and you want that stretch to feel the best and easiest it can feel.  You’re the only you, the only you that will ever exist.  You’re one of a kind.  Changing for yourself is your right and your responsibility. Make sure that the change you are making is for you and only for you, to be the best YOU for you.   An added benefit of that is that when you change for yourself, your change will automatically, naturally, and positively affect those around you.


So, how do we begin the change?  The easiest way to begin, especially the change we’ve been putting off or debating, is the same method we used to determine whether we need to change.  Ask yourself why you want to make the changeAre your why’s  rooted in desires?  What are you desiring that you think this change will satisfy?  Find out all your why’s, and go to the heart of them, the core desire underneath the why, and write them down on a card, note, or whiteboard or bulletin board.  Then, you’re ready to do the next step—make them stick.


How do you make changes stick? Here are a few steps and methods to create change that works.


Envision yourself and your life without that thing you do not want anymore, or with that thing you want. What would your life look like then?  How would you feel then?  What would you be able to do, be express, have, or experience then?  What else would change from that change being completed? Take notes on your vision. Write the details of what your situation will look like after the change and what it feels like.  This step really helps you see yourself as if the change already happened and supplies the content for the next step in making the change effective.


Divide the change or goal into mini changes. When people are serious about wanting to change something, they often set the bar too high: I will lose 100 pounds in six months.  When they don’t reach their lofty goal, the conditioned response of mental shame and self-critical tapes begin again: I’m a loser; She was right; I shouldn’t have tried this; I’m just no good at this.  Don’t set yourself up for disappointment.  Be kind to yourself.  Divide your big goal or change into smaller, reachable pieces and start simple until you find the pace that feels reachable. It doesn’t matter how long it takes.  You’re not in a race.  You’re not competing with anyone.  This is your life.  You design it to feel good and right to you.  When something feels good, we stick with it.  When we find our rhythm, we know it.  You can always adjust your pace as you get more confident in and inspired by your stride and abilities.  You will feel good about yourself, and that is the goal, besides aligning with your desired intention. 


An intention is a statement or declaration of what you will do, say, think, believe, be, or experience.  Thousands of years ago, the sages of India came to observe that we shape our ultimate destinies with our deepest intentions and desires.  Everything that happens in the universe begins with a desire, followed by an intention. Whether I’m buying a birthday present, working on a project, or calling a friend, I start with a desire and then set an intention that will satisfy that desire.  When you clarity and set an intention, write it down on the same note or card that you wrote the desire that created the intention, and keep that card or note somewhere that you will see every day.


In his article, “5 Steps to Setting Powerful Intentions,” Deepak Chopra, M.D., founder of The Chopra Center for Wellbeing, explained:


“Intention is the starting point of every dream. It is the creative power that fulfills all our needs, whether for money, relationships, spiritual awakening, or Love. An intention is a directed impulse of consciousness that contains the seed form of that which you aim to create. Like real seeds, intentions can’t grow if you hold on to them. Only when you release your intentions into the fertile depths of your consciousness can they grow and flourish. My book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, the Law of Intention and Desire, lays out the five steps for harnessing the power of intention to create anything you desire.


  1.  Slip into the Gap


Most of the time, your mind is caught up in thoughts, emotions, and memories. Beyond this noisy internal dialogue is a state of pure awareness that is the place called the gap. One of the most effective tools we have for entering the gap is meditation. Meditation takes you beyond the ego-mind into the silence and stillness of pure consciousness. This is the ideal state in which to plant your seeds of intention.


  1.  Release Your Intentions and Desires


Once you’re established in a state of restful awareness, release your intentions and desires. The best time to plant your intentions is during the period after meditation, while your awareness remains centered in the quiet field of all possibilities. After you set an intention, let it go — stop thinking about it. Continue this process for a few minutes after your meditation period each day.


  1.  Remain Centered, in a State of Restful Awareness


Intention is much more powerful when it comes from a place of contentment than if it arises from a sense of lack or need. Stay centered and refuse the influence of other people’s doubts or criticisms. Your higher self knows that everything is all right and will be all right, even without knowing the timing or the details of what will happen.


  1.  Detach from the Outcome


Relinquish your rigid attachment to a specific result and live in the wisdom of uncertainty. We base attachment on fear and insecurity, while I base detachment on the unquestioning belief in the power of your true Self. Intend for everything to work out as it should; Then allow opportunities and openings to come your way.


  1.  Let the Universe Handle the Details


Our focused intentions set the infinite organizing power of the universe in motion. Trust that infinite organizing power to orchestrate the complete fulfillment of your desires. Don’t listen to the voice that says you have to be in charge, that obsessive vigilance is the only way to get anything done. The outcome you try so hard to force may not be as good for you as the one that comes naturally. You have released your intentions into the fertile ground of pure potentiality, and they will bloom when the season is right.”



The more you see yourself as what you’d like to become,

and act as if what you want is already there,

the more you’ll activate those dormant forces that will collaborate

to transform your dream into your reality.

— Wayne Dyer


Writing is one of the most powerful and rapid methods to manifest what we want. Don’t type your desires, why’s, visions, and intentions.  Write them.  There is a different, more integrative energy and sensory process that affects our mind-body-heart connection when we pick up a pen or pencil and write, which does not happen when we type on a computer.  When you write each of these desires with intentions, make a few copies.  Don’t photocopywrite the copies.  The more we write it, the more deeply we plant the energy of our intention and form the new belief that will take us there.


Place these writings in clear sight of you in your daily actions.

The more we see something, the more it reminds us, the more it roots in our awareness, and the deeper it goes into our subconscious.  Keep a copy of your intention (s) in your wallet or purse, in a place where it will be visible by you each time you open your wallet or purse. When you feel weak, sad, shamed, fearful, or doubtful, pull it out to remind yourself why you are doing it.  Put another copy in a place you will see first thing in the morning, on the bathroom mirror, and last thing at night, next to your bed.  Put a copy in the kitchen, in the car, on the TV, on your computer frame, as a screensaver, and anywhere you can see it.


Read them aloud.

As you see each one throughout the day and night, read it out loud.  The energy of the voice resonates inside the heart.  When the mind hears you speak the intention you desire, the body feels it, and the heart will believe that it is.  Don’t worry about what others might think.  Just do it.  The positive change resulting from your readings will be powerful.


Get an accountability partner.

Being accountable is a great support resource for many people who need help to stay on track to accomplish any goal or change. If you’re being accountable only to yourself, and you don’t enjoy staying on track, who will know if you cheat or give up?  Who will encourage you to keep going?  Who will remember your why when you have temporarily forgotten or lost your way?  Choose an accountability partner who will commit to holding you accountable and reminding you of your why’s, your vision, and how deeply you desire the change. Make sure your accountability partner is someone you respect, someone who respects you, and someone who will always be honest with you.


Track Your Victories. 

Note and celebrate your victories, both large and small.  Create a journal—a Victory Journal. Write every victory, no matter how small. When you feel as if you’re pushing a heavy boulder up a steep mountain, you will need inspiration. Pull out the journal and read it out loud. When you hear yourself saying it, it registers on a subconscious level, and you will begin believing it. Reward yourself for the large victories. Count the small wins as steps toward the reward for the big one. Buy yourself a new something, treat yourself to a meal out, or celebrate in a way that’s meaningful to you.


Just be careful not to reward yourself with old habits or self-defeating, weakening rewards, like chocolate, gambling, a night out drinking, a shopping spree, or a whole day off from work when you have deadlines and commitments. You must face a whole new bushel of shaming self-talk and end up lower down the ladder.


Know that you can always push reset. 

What happens if you fall lower on the ladder and don’t stay on track in your efforts to change?  What happens if you give up before you reach your goal?  What happens if you make a mistake or you cheat?  Remember from Chapter 3 that everything happens for a reason.  Failures are lessons that teach us what did not work or something about ourselves or our desire that will help us get clearer and more certain. Failures never identify who we are.


Realizing that life offers learning with each slip, miss, or shift gives us an opportunity to experience and awaken to something new. Remember imagining when you first learned to walk and saying, after your first fall, “Well, that was a major mistake. I failed.  I guess I’m not meant to walk.” Failure is not the end.  It’s an opportunity to see what worked and what didn’t, try something new, and strengthen your walking muscles.  It’s a new starting point, a chance to re-calibrate and reset your feet.


You are in a constant state of change, even if you can’t feel it.  Your job is to create the changes you want ahead of time, by knowing what you want and why you want it and setting the wheels in motion with your intention.  You create your destiny.  You have the power to do so because; You are Great!


You are what your deepest desire is. As your desire is, so is your intention.

As your intention is, so is your will. As your will is, so is your deed.

As your deed is, so is your destiny.

— The Upanishads, Vedic text

I was like, ‘If I don’t change my mind,

if I don’t change my heart,

if I don’t develop some skill,

 I’m always going to be sleeping in my car.’

Tony Robbins

Mediocre is: “of only ordinary or moderate quality; neither good nor bad; barely adequate; not satisfactory; poor; inferior.”

Many have chosen a life of mediocrity.  They have settled and lowered their standards, to accept what is barely adequate. Most don’t know why or how, and they don’t always know ahead of time that they are about to do it.  They probably don’t realize that they do it, or that they have a history of doing it.  You may even be thinking that I don’t know what I’m talking about.  Take a deep breath, open your heart and mind for a few minutes, and hear me out.


When you began this life of yours, you didn’t intend to have any relationship, job, health, body, creativity, adventures, or life experiences that were less than fulfilling, or just ordinary. Yet here you are, less than fulfilled with life, perhaps slightly jaded, tired or sick, in pain, or maybe worse.


Have you consciously, or unconsciously, chosen that which appears safe, low- or risk-free, or that which pleases others, over what is right, uplifting, exciting, and pleasing to you?  How often have you taken the safe road, or the leftover choice, or the smaller pile, or the lesser value, even though you didn’t like it or want it?  Why?


Less than ten percent of college graduates work in the field of their degree. Most spend most of their adult years working at a job they can’t stand, for people they don’t respect, with people who bring them down, in an environment that makes them depressed, stressed, in pain, or sick.  Why do you think that is?


Less than ten percent of Americans own and operate a small business.  Are you one of the ten percent?  Or, are you one of the ninety percent?  Why is that?  Do you think the ten percent are smarter than you, more capable than you, more creative than you, more skilled or gifted than you, better than you, more deserving than you? If you think yes to any of these, you’re under the influence of a false belief.  If you think that those ten percent want their work life to be better than ordinary and are willing to take risks, if necessary, to have that, you are absolutely right.  If you think they are not afraid, you are mistaken.  They just don’t let fear get in the way of their focus and vision.  They do not settle for mediocrity.


Yes, they are risk takers, but so are the ninety percent who haven’t taken the risk and followed their passion to create their own businesses.  Think about it.  What risks do we take when we don’t step out and try something new, scary, or difficult?  What risks do we take when we don’t reach for something that we want, create something that excites us, try something that enlivens us, go for something that inspires us, or learn something that challenges us?  What happens when we settle?


This is what happens:  we disappoint ourselves; we lose faith in our abilities; we lose happiness; we affect others around us; we weaken ourselves; we co-depend on others; we stay in discomfort, depression, or suffering; we shrink ourselves; we settle for less; we get sick; we lose our energy; we give up on ourselves; we let others down; we lose our selves; we fall into mediocrity, or worse.  A much heavier load awaits those who don’t risk taking a chance on themselves.


Why do we settle for a mediocre life, relationship, job, health, experiences?  Why do we measure ourselves by the standards and opinions of others?  Why do we suppress our desires and shrink our dreams?  Why do we care more about the opinions, words, ideas, needs, and desires of others than we do our own?  Why are we afraid?  What is the ultimate reason we are living a mediocre life? 


We do that because we believe we are not good enough.  We do that because we don’t want to have more or better than others who have not.  Why?  Because others convince us that we should settle.  Because we were taught that we’re nobody special, and we can’t have what we want, and no one’s life is perfect anyway, and we will have to settle, because life is hard, and that only the strong, lucky, smart, active, educated, supported people can start that business, audition for that role, try out for that competition, paint that masterpieces, have that relationship, look that way, live that way.


From birth, those in our familial, communal, religious, educational, societal, political, and/or cultural environments have—mostly unintentionally—conditioned us to:


  • forget who we are, forget what we’re capable of, and why we’re here
  • believe that we’re here to please and serve everyone over ourselves
  • care about and follow what others do, say, and think, over what we want, think, and know
  • believe that we are not capable or deserving of creating the life we desire if others don’t
  • believe that we need to be approved of and included in some existing group, rather than freely following our independent compasses
  • forget that we are born free.


Of all of life’s creatures, we are the only species that gets up or keeps going when we’re tired, force ourselves to sleep when we’re not tired, to go to a job that we don’t want, and live a life of self-inflicted suffering.   We do that rather than take the risks in the areas that give us the most vitality, joy, and self-empowerment.  And, inside, we feel the guilt and the burden of giving up on ourselves, so we push ourselves in other ways, convincing ourselves that we must, all the while, settling deeper into mediocrity.



Pause to Write.  


Write your thoughts on the following.  If a response doesn’t come easily, pass it and go to the next.  Come back later if you have a new awareness on any that you skipped.


If you didn’t have to go to the job you have now, would you?  


Are you doing what you’ve had to do?  Or, are you doing what you Love to do?


If you had a choice (and you do), would you do things differently?


If you stopped looking backward, and if you stopped regret, what would you change?


What’s holding you back?


Are you afraid of what others might think?


Whose life are you living?  If not yours, why?


Are you still wishing, reaching, hoping?


If not, what stopped you?


When did you first learn to settle for mediocre?


Where have you cared more about the opinions, words, and ideas of others than your own?


Where have you given yourself away, suppressed your vitality, or shrunk yourself?


Who did you learn that from?


When did you stop being excited and riding the momentum of your ideas, desires, wishes, and dreams?


What desires have you suppressed?


What dreams have you downsized or buried?



A dream is something you eat, sleep, live, and breathe. You think about it and refine it so that you can’t see any separation between you and the dream.  You are intertwined. Nothing will stop you from getting it. It’s that important to you.  When I ask people if they have a dream, almost all of them say yes. So why don’t they act on it? Why don’t they start that business venture? Why don’t they go back to school?  Change careers?  Sell their house?  Move to that country? Build that widget? Travel the world?  Buy a sailboat?  Learn to play music?


You can tell the size of a person’s dream by how much it takes to put it aside.  Think about that. You have a wish to lose those fifteen pounds.  You know you should.  You really, really want to.  Yet, you put it aside for the immediate gratification of the ice cream, beer, pasta, piece of chocolate, or cheeseburger. Why?  


Because it is just a wish in your mind.  Because you somehow learned that dreams don’t come true.  You’ve tried before and didn’t make it.  You don’t want to be disappointed.  You don’t believe in yourself.  Or, you want to believe in yourself, but you might make someone else feel bad who isn’t pursuing their dream.  Or, someone has told you that your dream is too big.  So, you put it aside.  You don’t allow yourself to imagine anymore, or as big as before.  You stop visioning, in vivid color, what you will look like, feel like, be like, or be able to experience by reaching for and realizing your dream.  You forget the feel of the power of the dreaming.  You no longer allow your passion to electrify you.



Pause to write.


You may not remember but allow yourself to think back. Before the world told you that you couldn’t do it, you had a dream. You felt good.  You were excited.  You were energized.  You couldn’t wait to start another day.  You wanted to do something. You wanted to expand and explore. You wanted to create something. You wanted to go somewhere. Can you remember what you wanted?


Knowing that you can make a different choice, what do you want to do differently?

Where do you want to live?

What do you want to do?

What kind of work do you really want to do?

What do you dream of?

Whose destiny are you creating?

When will it be time to start consciously creating your own destiny?  Your own happiness?



I attended a seminar lead by one of the top Transformational Life Coaches in the United States, Lisa Nichols.  In sharing her inspiring story, she impressed upon us the importance of:


  • Not living an average life
  • Realizing that life is not promised
  • Knowing that we cannot wait for the right time
  • Being uncomfortable with mediocrity


She asked us, “What if extraordinary was your birthright? How would you act?


So, I ask you, what if everyone has been wrong?  What if all the teachers and officials and parents and religious leaders taught us the wrong information?  What if they didn’t know, because they were just following the same recipe that had been handed down for generations, afraid to challenge it or change it, or attempt a bigger recipe?  What if we really are extraordinary?  What if having an extraordinary life is our birthright?


Let me tell you once more:  You were not born just so-so.  You were never barely adequate. You were not born so that you could live a mediocre life.  You were born special and capable. You are powerful and valuable. You are born worthy of living a brilliant and beautiful life.  You are one of the four great powers. You are GREAT!


To shift from believing that you must settle for mediocrity, to knowing that you are extraordinary, you must know that you are your own rescue. You are your own remedy.  Not your government, not your justice system, not your educational institution, not your parents, not your children, not your friends, not your partner, not your job, not your possessions.  




[Source] is the mother of the Universe. For lack of a better name, I call it the Tao.

The Tao is great. The Universe is great. Earth is great. Man is great.

These are the four great powers.

— Tao de Chang

It was spring. The sun was shining and the birds were singing as I was walking to work looking forward to another great day at the new job I had worked so hard to land. It was a
great place to work, good people, fun work, fantastic environment, the clients and boss loved me. Little did I realize how much my life would change in such a short time when I encountered “The Hole”. The Hole simply stated is the experience we encounter if we don’t pay attention to the signs we see every day and ignore. Allow me to explain my experience.
Day one: I was walking to work that day and had a great deal on my mind. I had an argument with a co-worker, my girlfriend was unhappy with my “obsession” with work, my friends complained I never came around anymore, and my parents never heard from me. As I was walking and rationalizing these things out loud I suddenly fell into a very large hole. It came out of nowhere. I never saw it coming. It was deep, dark, scary, and I couldn’t get out. I was afraid. I could not get out alone. My day now became worse. I rationalized that this wasn’t my fault. Why weren’t their signs posted that a hole was here? Why wasn’t someone here to help me? I did not deserve this. This was the first stage of my experience.
Day two: I walked down the same street. The birds did not sing and the clouds covered the brightness and warmth of the sun. I was not happy. I saw the hole. It was enormous! I saw a great many signs that said “DANGER”. As I fell into the hole again I remember thinking “why am I doing this, its dark, its cold, and I’m afraid.” It seemed like forever before anyone noticed I was there. I could not get out alone, again. This was the second stage of my experience.
Day three: I was walking down the same street. It was slightly warmer than the day before. As I approached the hole I took notice of the jagged edges I could have really hurt myself on the days before. It was the largest hole ever in existence in all of mankind. I looked around and found something to make a larger warning sign with. I didn’t want anyone who came behind me to fall for fear of hurting themselves. I made it large, very large so everyone could see. I remember feeling that I had done such a wonderful thing as I walked around the hole. It felt so good to know someone wouldn’t have to go through what I went through. I cringed when I heard someone scream as they fell into the hole behind me. This was the third stage of my experience.
Day four: The sun was shining and the birds were singing as I walked down a different street. This was the final stage of my experience.

Now when I walk to work (or anywhere for that matter) I pay close attention to all the wonderful things I had missed and taken for granted and didn’t take the time to notice the days before. I enjoy my walks more now. I seem to walk a lot these days. I hear a lot of people behind me falling into the hole. I guess they didn’t see the signs either