“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. We cannot change it without changing our thinking.”

― Albert Einstein[1]

 

The past, we all have one. It’s a good place to visit occasionally, just don’t park there. Contrary to popular belief, your past is not who you are, it’s just where you have been. You cannot Change your Past, but you can Change your Future. Here’s how.

The Oxford Dictionary defines past as: Gone by in time and no longer existing.[2] Yet some of us treat it as still in the present, still existing.

The past can leave scars, some deeper than others. The past might create bad habits. The past can create trust issues. The past can create forgiveness issues. The past can create all these things if we give it the power to do so.

I have a past. I have scars. I have had trust issues, bad habits, even forgiveness issues, until I didn’t.

When we give in to the power of the past, we are no longer in control of our own future. It takes control of our lives, our relationships, our friendships, and even our interaction with our fellow humans. You cannot Change your Past, but you can Change your Future.

When we associate ourselves with our past, we will experience feelings of guilt, shame, anxiety, regret, bitterness, resentment, low self-esteem, and even anger. But why do we hang on to these negative feelings? We hold on to these negative feelings out of fear. Fear of feeling pain which allows a comfort in our lives without feeling vulnerable.

When we encounter triggers that bring up our issues from the past we act on automatic out of self-preservation, or so we think. We hear those thoughts in our heads saying “see, it’s happening AGAIN”. It is easy to sabotage a simple situation when we act based on past experiences.

A man entered the subway car with his three children where he sat down and stared down at the floor while his children went about being unruly, disturbing the fellow passengers unnoticed by their father.

One passenger firmly asked the man to “control his children”. As if in a daze, the man lifted his head and looked at the passenger and said, “my apologies. They just lost their mother, cancer, and I guess this is how they are responding to it.”

The past, while valid, clouds our judgement in our present and future decisions unless we release ourselves from it. Not all men or women cheat, so thinking they do now won’t help you stay in a healthy relationship. Not all children are wild, so judging them without fully knowing the circumstances can backfire.

Creating a bright future requires us to move on from the past. We must change our way of thinking. We must change our way of looking at things. We must change the way we react to things.

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.”

― Leo Tolstoy[3]

 

You cannot change your Past, but you can Change your Future. In my recently published book titled You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here  Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so I discuss how to be free from our past. How to live free from our past and not allow it to block the forward momentum of our future.https://www.josephbinning.com/failure%e2%9c%b5your-past-is-not-who-you-are-so-dont-give-up/

 

I discuss how our perceptions shape our thought process of how we see things and react to them in our daily life. When we perceive things as black and white because we are viewing life without the proper filters to allow us to see things as they really are, we decide based on bad data, thus we make yet another poor decision.

Unless we maintain a forward-directed focus and a firm belief in our “Self”, it will always be easy to allow our failures to block our progress.

Failures do not identify who we are.  Failures are lessons that teach us what did not work.

— Joseph Binning

Realizing that there are no mistakes in life without lessons is the first key to seeing that our past, or—as some may refer to it — failures, is an opportunity to learn or experience something new. There are no mistakes without lessons.  Everything happens for a reason, for our learning.

 

YOUR BELIEFS-Where Did They Come From?
Remember to enjoy the little things in life.

If you have enjoyed this article please visit me at www.JosephBinning.com for more helpful tips and articles.

You can also get more helpful information in my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so

For my free report Happiness Is A Choice click here: Happiness Is A Choice Free Report

Remember: Happiness is a choice, so choose to be happy.

[1] Change Quotes/Goodreads.com/accessed 10/05/2020/ https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/change

[2] Oxford Dictionary/Past Definition/accessed 10/05/2020/https:// https://www.lexico.com/definition/past

[3] Change Quotes/Goodreads.com/accessed 10/05/2020/ https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/change

How to Find Happiness in Hard Times

Life can sometimes be hard, ridiculously hard. It was designed to be. If it weren’t, we wouldn’t appreciate it when it’s not. It’s in the hard times that we develop our character. Shaped into the person who it meant us to be. How to Find Happiness in Hard Times can sometimes be a challenge unless you know where to look.

We’ve all been there. Stuck in feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy. When times get hard, these feelings leave us overwhelmed, unempowered, and out of control. It can leave you unmotivated to move forward. How to Find Happiness in Hard Times is when, despite yourself, you push forward. You give it just one more try.

 

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Too many people give up when it seems impossible, but…

 

“When everything seems to go against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.

-Henry Ford [1]

When I was younger, I had the belief that some external source could make me happy. If I just had this thing, or girl, or job, it would make me happy. But it didn’t. I kept chasing after things, physical things, emotional things, spiritual things, but even though they brought about momentary happiness, it never lasted.

One day I was at a conference and overheard a group of ladies talking about the subject. One woman was the wife of a remarkably successful man and was asked by another woman, “how does your husband make you happy? The woman of the successful man shocked the other woman and myself when she answered, “oh, he can’t make me happy, only I can make me happy”.

I was at that conference looking for the answer to being happy and found it from his wife accidently.

Happiness is a choice. Happiness is an internal choice. Happiness is an internal choice with a decision to accept that choice. Once you accept that choice you will begin to feel Happiness in Hard Times and in Good Times.

In my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so, which you can purchase on Amazon here: Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so, I discuss a few topics that will help you find Happiness in Hard Times.

  1. Forgiveness

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    Forgive

     

In my chapter Forgiveness: Not for the Other Person I explain, you need to forgive both yourself and others. Forgiveness is about you and not the other person. You must get to the place  where you ask for forgiveness out loud with a sincere heart.

 Forgive yourself for feeling unhappy because you were looking in the wrong place for it.

  Forgive others who you burdened your happiness with, who never could have created it for you.

 

  1. Take back the power you gave your past.

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    Take back your power

In my chapter Failure: Where You Are: Not Where You Have Been, I discuss how your past does not make you who you are. It only dictates where you have been. Only you have the power to dictate who you are. Many of us associate our happiness with our past and allow guilt or regrets to interfere with it.

 

 

 

 

  1. Live a life of no regrets

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    Live a life of no regrets

 In my chapter Regrets: Why They Are Harmful I discuss why we should not have any. Mistake are lessons we make so we can learn. Would we like a life with no mistakes? Can you imagine a  life never learning?

       Choose wisely before you act, own the decision, then move on.

 

 

 

  1. Change your beliefs about yourself.

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    Change your beliefs about yourself

In my chapter Beliefs: Where Did They Come From? I discuss how some beliefs we have about ourselves and others can sometimes come from worthless information. If you are told for a long time you are not worthy is it no surprise you feel that way?

The truth is you are worthy. You are valuable, just as you are. You are not broken, damaged goods, or a throwaway person. Believe you are worthy, maybe for the first time, and you will see    and feel happiness.

 

 

  1. Find your Joy.

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    find your joy

In my chapter Joy: How to Find It—and Keep It I discuss the importance of having Joy in your life. Joy, simply stated, is that which brings you peace. It charges your batteries. It shapes  your worldview, and the view of yourself.

Joy is a choice. Joy is both internal and external. Joy does not mean you will never be sad or hurt. But with joy in your life it won’t last. Joy brings about an external feeling of happiness that radiates within you, which brings internal happiness. You feel a sense of happiness. Happiness makes you feel better about yourself. When you feel better about yourself you treat others better. This is how we change the world, one person at a time.

 

 

But it starts with you.

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Change starts with you

 

If you have enjoyed this, please visit me at www.JosephBinning.com for more helpful tips and articles.

 

You can also get more helpful information in my book You Matter, even if you don’t think so which you can purchase on Amazon here Amazon You Matter, even if you don’t think so

 

Remember: Happiness is a choice, so choose to be happy.

Happiness Is A Choice Free Report

 

[1] Henry Ford > Quotes > Quotable Quote, goodreads, accessed 09/28/2020, https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/107178-when-everything-seem-to-be-going-against-you-remember-that